Short stories and poems from humorist and rom-com mystery novelist Anne R. Allen. Some stories, like "Vive La Revolution"--which first appeared in the edgy humor magazine Opium, are satire--and others are more heartfelt. But they are all humorous portraits of rebellious women at various stages of their lives. From aging Betty Jo, who feels so invisible she contemplates robbing a bank, to neglected 10-year-old Maude, who turns to a fantasy Elvis for the love she's denied by her patrician family, to a bloodthirsty Valley Girl version of Madam Defarge, these women—young and old—are all rebelling against the stereotypes and traditional roles that hold them back. Which is, of course, why Grandma bought that car…
Genre: HUMOR / GeneralThis is a collection o short stories and poetry from blogging guro Anne R. Allen, author of the acclaimed The Camilla Randall Mysteries series.
Betty Jo Stevenson Rides Again
On the Monday morning after her silver wedding anniversary, Betty Jo Stevenson found a lump in her breast. She was taking her morning shower when she felt it—just a little thing—like a nasty pebble, stuck beneath the spongy layer of flesh of the underside of her left breast. Why hadn’t she noticed it before?
Fighting for breath, she turned off the water and felt for it again. There it was: a real lump. How long had it been there? She probably didn’t self-examine as often as she should. She’d never been able to get over the feeling that touching herself was a little naughty, and besides, she didn’t like to be reminded of the toll that fifty-two years of gravity had taken on her figure.
She stepped out of the tub still sudsy, cradling the heavy sack of her breast in her hand, keeping a finger on the lump. She needed to tell Bob, who was standing right there in his white jockey shorts, shaving, but she couldn’t think of the words. Had the light over the sink always been that bright? She almost had to squint to look at him.
Her mind filled with a ridiculous memory—that time in high school when the girls told her that bad-boy biker Frankie Russo had a picture of her in her cheerleading sweater taped inside his locker. Right next to the one of Raquel Welch in her cavegirl bikini.
"Betty Boobs, he calls you," somebody said. Probably Lucinda. She always knew all the nasty gossip, even then. "You should do something. Don’t let him think you’re some biker slut."
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Italian
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Already translated.
Translated by Arianna Introini
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Author review: Excellent work. Great communications. |
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Portuguese
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Already translated.
Translated by Mauricio Goldani Lima and Jean Pierre Barakat
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Author review: Excellent work. Great communications. |
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Spanish
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Translation in progress.
Translated by Ekaterina Tkatcheva
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